exclusive interview with jeff crump (repost)

talking to jeff crump about /that/ arctic monkeys concert

Let’s get this straight. 

Jeff Crump is not British, he has seen your memes, and he was not high at the Arctic Monkeys concert in 2006. 

Jeff Crump at the Arctic Monkeys concert is a meme as straight-forward as they come. The photo’s grainy quality, laughably simple caption, and ultimate journey to Facebook ostensibly leaves no room for questions: It’s Jeff Crump at the Arctic Monkeys concert on July 5th 2006.

I first came across the image when it was used in a variation of the “you must be x if you think we fucking” meme. And something about Jeff’s expression, hypnotic in its blankness, enticed me to dig deeper. Who is Jeff Crump? Was this a serious attempt at a good picture? What’s he up to now?  

To track Jeff down, I found a Tweet that led me to a listicle which linked me to a Reddit thread that led me back to Twitter - this time to Jeff’s actual account. It’s a beautiful illustration of the internet’s capacities as well as a scary reminder that you can upload an innocuous picture to your private Facebook account in 2006, and a random person will try to email you about it 16 years later!

Jeff is a super duper cool dude who agreed to answer all my little questions. We talked about flip phones, beating the British allegations, and the latest album to come from our favorite glacial apes. Below is a redacted version of our conversation.

When did you realize you were a meme?

I got a few random messages on social media on April 2021. "Arctic Monkeys?" "You don't have access to your old Facebook account!" "Bet you looked good on the dance floor" No comment by itself make sense, then my nephew you messaged me the pic. Then my niece from a different sibling text me. An hour later my girl friends son was like "is this you?" We then saw all the amazing comments.

How was the concert itself?

Tempe, AZ that month is 105-115⁰F (44-48⁰C). I was 21 years old, I enjoyed going out and drinking excessively, completely letting loose.  I remember it being very warm there, something happened with the AC, it was as warm inside as it was outside. Nothing too crazy happened, band came on rocked, we enjoyed it. I wasn't high, only caffeine, alcohol and nicotine.

Was the caption meant to be funny or are you a pretty straight-forward guy IRL.

I'm very laid back, can't seem to take a serious photo. Stay as young as I can. Experience life to the fullest.

Did you know there’s a lot of people who think you’re British? Why do you think that is?

I feel very American, but 23 and me confirmed a lot of British and Irish genes.

Best Arctic Monkeys album?

Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not

Do you still listen to the Arctic Monkeys? If so what do you think of their new album.

I don't listen to them as much. I listened to a few of their songs from The Car and wasn’t impressed, they have evolved and Im not that into their newer music. Im happy for them and their creative juices are still flowing. If they played at a small venue locally I would definitely go see them. I still think I have that youthful exuberance and go to shows, not crowd surfing anymore, love the energy from a live show.

What were some of 2006 Jeff's other favorite artists? How about now?

I was taking in a lot of live music those years. I was on stage with Andrew W.K and Matisyahu. Coldplay, Hoobastank, Foo Fighters, Black Sabbath, Vendetta Red, Ween. Now I'm into alt-J, Imagine Dragons, Glass Animals and still Foo Fighters (seen them 4 times live)

he loves climbing those mountains!

Jeff, now 37, works at a technology manufacturer and is a proud father of two. He leads an idyllic life in the countryside where he tends after farm animals, busying himself with horses more than monkeys these days. He still loves music, but isn’t able to go to as many live shows as he once did. “I wish I could go to more concerts, but parenting is hard. More money goes to them eating over priced bags of chips instead of seeing people singing live,” he wrote in an email. 

One of the last questions I asked Jeff was if he went to the concert with anyone. I was always under the impression he went alone, a detail that made the picture funnier. To my surprise, he recounts he actually went with a few coworkers. “Kevin would hype different events, we would decide if we would go. I rarely had to DD, Jeanna would be dancing, Donaldson lived nearby at the campus. Vinnie would come to a few.” I sensed melancholy in the sweet way he name dropped his friends to me - like I was in Tempe that night myself. The picture looked different now. More complete.

Maybe Jeff Crump at the Arctic Monkeys concert on July 5th 2006 wasn’t as straight-forward as we thought. For example, a lot of people see the timestamp on the screenshot and assume the picture was taken at warped tour (the Arctic Monkeys played there in early July 2006). However, Jeff tells me the picture is actually from an earlier concert when the south pole primates played a smaller venue by his university. It took him a month to upload the picture hence the confusion. When something as simple as a date can get distorted in the noise of the internet, what can we assume about someone’s life?

Jeff Crump, the meme, is a British mad-lad who’s had one too many coke lines or whatever. But Jeff Crump, the person, is 21, fresh off a move back from Japan and enjoying a night out with friends. He beholds the unfolding moment and decidedly snaps a photo, preserving life’s transience in shoddy light and megapixels. Because who knows where he’ll be 16 years from now? For tonight, in a hot Arizona venue with broken A/C, it’s just him, his friends, and the music.

Arctic Monkeys 😳.